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The Total Bastard Database

The greatest killers, madmen, monsters and maniacs in horror movie history.

SPOILER WARNING!!


All entries in the TBDB are likely to carry spoliers so if you ain't seen the movie they relate to don't read 'em!

 
 

PREDATOR

AKA:

Kevin Peter Hall, Ian Whyte

Was a bastard in:

Predator (1987), Predator 2 (1990), Alien Vs Predator (2004), Aliens Vs Predator: Requiem (2007)

So who the hell are they?

The Predators are very large, very unpleasant, very dreadlocked aliens who love nothing more than hunting. They apparently live for the hunt and travel the galaxy looking for fascinating new species to murder and decapitate. Nice fellows. They are said to have a very profound sense of honour, never hunting the defenceless – unarmed, pregnant or young. Their hunting code of honour doesn’t seem to stop them from turning invisible, using massive shoulder mounted laser-cannons and

pale man

fighting hand to hand with species 2 foot shorter than them with about half the physical strength however. Pretty much the same sort of honour as hunters on this planet then : “it’s fair as long as there’s no conceivable way that I can lose”.

That’s not a knife…

The average Predator is armed to the teeth – literally seeing as it has quite a nasty looking pair of mandibles underneath that cool-looking space helmet,/mask thing. They use the afore-mentioned shoulder mounted laser cannon with its natty infra-red targeting system quite a lot but also have a fancy spear thing and wrist mounted blades for close combat. They also seem to have a bit of a penchant for fishnet which is slightly incongruous with the whole alien bad-ass image but hey, they’re a technologically superior race who had mastered intergalactic space travel while humanity were still working out how to build pyramids, they’re probably cool with the whole cross-dressing thing.

 

Why, for the love of God, Why??!!?

They just love killing stuff really. It’s that hunting fetish mentioned earlier that;’s to blame. If it moves they want to kill it really. They’ve also been doing this for a bloody long time so they probably aren’t going to see the error of their ways anytime soon. So what’s the damage? Considering they have been visiting this planet for millennia and even had a hand in shaping early civilisation the damage is pretty high. It’s even higher if you take into account that they also let a load of Aliens loose on some ancient city by accident and nuked the whole place to get rid of them.

Words of wisdom:

The only words these guys speak is the recorded sounds of their victims. They also make that cool animalistic clicking noise though. I like that.

 

By Matt Compton

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